A Bit of Sense, Unexpectedly...

I have, you may or may not know, an absurd affinity for tractors. Especially old ones. Particularly old ones with the name 'Massey' on them. When I was a kid, my grandfather had two tractors. A 1963 Massey Ferguson 35 Diesel, and a late 70s Massey Ferguson 265. My first hat was red mesh with an 'MF' logo patch on the front that he'd been given when he bought the 265. Somewhere there is, or was, in existence a polaroid snapshot of me, two years old and shirtless, sitting on the driver's seat of that tractor, wearing massive plastic sunglasses, because it was 1984 and I was 2 and such seemed cool to me, and a blue bandana around my neck because I had a slight drooling problem. I remember riding on the 265's rear fenders, flying down the road from our house to the cattle pasture, much to my mother's consternation.

For a few years, my grandfather owned a late '40s John Deere Model A Tricycle (tricycle referring to the front wheel set up, not the size of the machine). My uncle Moe had a 1970s John Deere. The 265 was eventually traded for a big 1594 Case made in the mid-80s, the 35 sold on and replaced by a Massey Ferguson 245. It was this one that I always worked with around the farm. The Case, in its turn, was traded for a John Deere 5300, which he still has, along with the 245, another 1963 MF 35 (bought together with the previous one, this was his dad's, my great-grandfather's, and my wife and I left our marriage blessing riding this machine a few months ago). Just for fun, my grandfather's also bought a 1956 John Deere 320, and a 1959 JD 630.

Between the 2 of us, we've given up on buying books about tractors (they are available, and regular sellers at all the best book shops, don't laugh), because we tend to have compounded more knowledge than even the books that are erroneously titled as 'complete.' We like tractors. He has a model collection of about 50 1/16 scale tractors; I have about 80.

That's because I went to work for John Deere, and all of a sudden, model collecting got easier. Consequently, most of mine are green, and I can quote John Deere company history as if it were my own. Yes, I agree, it is sick.

When I interviewed for the position at our local John Deere Dealership, the man who went on to become my boss said, "Well, you're certainly qualified, but I've got to ask, Why do you WANT the job?" Because, at the time, I'd just completed my Bachelor's Degree in Creative Writing. I want to be an author, after all. Going to work selling repair parts for broken down John Deere tractors and implements isn't particularly en route to publication.

You wouldn't think.

Such was the conversation my wife and I were having about 6 weeks ago, as I was reading one of my monthly tractor magazines (there are more published than you might expect.) Her exact words were, "It's too bad you can't find a position writing about tractors. That would sort everything out." Indeed it would, but I'd already tried contacting my favourite publications, and no one was hiring. I am actually, because I'm anal, proofreading, post-publication, an alleged 'Complete Encyclopedia of Farm Tractors,' because it isn't. So far, I've found 19 brands that have been left out, and the wording throughout is horrendous. I'm correcting it in red pen and posting it back to the publisher. I know, I know, I'm sick.

When, lo and behold, jumped off the page an advertisement for this year’s Guild of Agricultural Journalists/John Deere Training Award-- a week-long, intensive Journalism Course run by a company I'm quite familiar with, training and qualifying only 10 souls per year for the hitherto unattainable table land of farming publication. I duly applied, and was notified last week of my acceptance to the course, much to mine and Katie's elation. I'll take the train down to Nottingham, of all places, in just under 2 weeks, where I'll spend the first half of the course, before being sent out over the latter half on an actual assignment. This means, theoretically, that in less than a month, I should actually be a published writer.

So, why Should an aspiring author apply for a job selling tractor parts? I've no idea. It's just what I wanted to do. All roads have their strange winds and bends...